Personal Stories

My Biggest Weakness

Posted by Maria Jo Stephens on
I’m back!
….again…..
I believe this will now be the third time that I have set my mind to blogging. (For those of you who don’t know this is like the 10th blog I’ve started) Prior attempts were smothered out by lack of ideas, and  bountiful amounts of excuses. I know it’s hard as a reader to want to follow along a blogger’s journey when you never know when or if they will post again. You may be wondering, “Why should I get sucked in again?”, “You’re just going to ghost us in a month”, “What’s different this time?” and so on. 
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Here’s ultimately the reason why I always stopped blogging:
I CAN’T KEEP PROMISES TO MYSELF
I am someone who is a huge people pleaser. I never say no to anyone. If you ask me to do something for you, I will, even if that means breaking a prior commitment I had for some alone time. Whether that alone time was going to be spent doing homework, watching How I Met Your Mother, or writing a blog, I will drop everything to please someone. 
It has always been and still is what I consider my biggest weakness.
I will never break a promise to someone else, but when it comes to myself, I don’t even think twice about it.
I get so wrapped up in doing everything for everyone else, that I forget about myself. What I want. What I need. 

Just this last Sunday, all I wanted to do is go to the store and buy shortening, ice cream, and caramel sauce, so I could make brownie sundaes for my family. 
Once my family heard I was going out, all of them started asking if I could run an errand for them while I was out. (To be fair-I did ask my father if he wanted me to grab stuff for dinner, since I would be at the store anyway) But all of a sudden, I spent three hours driving all around Utah County doing things for everyone else. When all I needed to do was drive two blocks and pick up three things from the store.
And you know what?
I forgot all of the stuff I wanted at the store, because I was too busy making sure I had everything for everyone else.

That’s when I decided I was done.
Done prioritizing everyone else before myself.
Done taking care of everyone, if I have to sacrifice myself in the process.
Don’t get me wrong. I’ll still be that girl you can count on to help you out. As long as I am taken care of too. I don’t consider selfish. I consider it finally living for myself and not for others. 

One thing that I have ALWAYS wanted to do is blog. I am promising myself today, that I will be a better blogger.
Here’s some goals I am doing to keep this promise-feel free to use if you have been wanting to start a blog:
1. Write at least one blog idea-EVERY DAY!
2. Look at all my ideas and pick one for a weekly blog. I am probably going to schedule Sunday, as blog day for sake of routine.
3. No excuses. Even if it’s not your best idea or post. It’s something. Not everything will be a hit. Consider it practice, the more you do, the easier the ideas and the words will come. It’s all about building the habit.

So yes, I am back, back again.
Feel free to tag along 🙂

Much love and support,
Maria Jo Stephens

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